For the first time in my post-college life, I took time off for the holidays. Oh-my-goodness, why didn’t I do this sooner? For the first time in awhile, I feel well-rested and ready to go back to work tomorrow. I have been going to doctors since October trying to figure out why I feel so sick (hence the absence from the blog, and really, life). Turns out, a holiday break leads to feeling great.

I feel a little guilty saying “why didn’t I take time off sooner” though. I know there are some budding career people that read this blog on occasion. Not taking time off during holidays was a good career thing for me in years past — and I work in a newsroom so I don’t plan on making it habit. It was the first time I covered major breaking news as a junior reporter and the day after Thanksgiving was the the first time I went out and did live shots three months into my first public relations job. Because while the A-team is away, it’s time for the B-team to step up. And when the B-team proves itself, you get promoted. In theory anyway. At least you build experience.

So I took two days off this year so I could plan 2013 ideas and catch up on house projects away from the hustle of the newsroom. And sleep. Glorious rest that has me itching to go back tomorrow. And already planning vacations for this year so I can continue to be a well-rested human throughout the year. Because as I type this clear-headed and not exhausted, I can tell that I work best this way. Find out how you work best — and then figure out how to make a living doing that. Maybe it’s the start up environment. Maybe it’s at home. Working corporate taught me that I definitely missed the newsroom feel.

Also, I am hoping to write more in 2013. I promised my friend Joanna I wouldn’t lose my voice because it leads to good health, which will also be a goal in 2013, because, as I said, oh-my-goodness, I feel good right now.

Sometimes you keep going and going and then you pause and you are all “dude, why does it feel like I am wading through mud?”

I realized last week that I need a win. Of some sort. And then it hit me that it was a long weekend. And I got excited. And since some wins you can control, and some you can cannot, I’m taking this long weekend as a win. Hopefully we don’t have some sort of disaster. #knockonwood

Because right now I’m feeling about like this tree we bought from the classifieds. I guess I could call it as a win that the super nice couple we bought it from took it back. We are still in the market for a 9′ tree if you see one. We’d like all the lights to work though.

This has been happening for the past 24 hours. I swear it is going to snow more this weekend than it snowed all of last year.

We just had this conversation:
Me: look it isn’t snowing for a minute! Hurry go get food!
Husband: well now you got me into this show.

I am a little worried about this tree. It used to offer some privacy from our neighbors. And now it looks smashed down. I hope it doesn’t break down

So, super cool thing happened tonight. Well, super cool if you are a total nerd. But hey. Anyway, a hashtag that I created — #kslpolitics — trended tonight — along with a hashtag at an event I was speaking at — #smcslc. Isn’t that awesome? And I don’t want to sound all “go me” because really, it takes hundreds or thousands of tweets to trend.

It’s just really cool to be a part of it all. I am coming up on my anniversary at KSL and moments like tonight remind me why I love my job. I can say, “hey, let’s put a hashtag on TV before the debate” and we do. And then we trend.

The first time I saw us trending I freaked out. And I can officially confirm that even though I have lost count of how many times we’ve hit the top spot, I never get tired of it.

#yay

Also, mom, this blog post will probably make no sense to you. Just do a happy dance.

Have you heard about PBS’ Half the Sky documentary?

It’s a two-part look on issues facing women around the world, based on a book by the same name. Rape, sex trafficking, lack of education, inequality in so many ways. Domestic violence, child abuse. It’s rampant.

Despite those tough topics, the documentary tries to highlight people making change happen. I watched it thinking “good for them” and also “these people know what running into a brick wall repeatedly feels like.”

We watched the first part tonight after I came home from a marathon day at work. Now, I’m wide awake thinking about it. I often watch oppression like that and try to explain how God exists in my head. “How can a 8-year-old get raped 30 times a day and God helps me find my keys?”

And this statement has my brain rolling:

The more conservative a culture, the higher percentage of prostitution and the less valued the women are.

In society, many survivors of violence are shamed. Once saved from brothels, the male community leaders — men who likely frequent the brothels — shun the women. Victims of crime are kicked out of their homes by their fathers for being raped. It’s a prize to devirginize a girl — and then husbands are upset when their wife isn’t a virgin. It doesn’t make sense.

I do know that if you think it’s not happening in the United States–that these are only problems for the developing world–you are wrong. On the sexual assault response team in San Diego, I was trained on how to look for child prostitutes so we could help them. And the training was utilized.

Watch the documentary. Talk to people about it. Lets not let these problems be buried. My heart aches tonight for women I will never meet.

P.S. thanks for your comments about blogging. I am still thinking.

I just got the heads up that my blog hosting fees are due. And for the first time in five years I thought “hmm, maybe I am done. I have Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest and Twitter.”

But. I freaking love having a “home base” online to share. Last year it was outfits and a life transition. In grad school, blogging became my sillier, non-business voice. Back in 2008, I fell in love with writing about and exploring politics.

It didn’t feel right to have an editorial voice and work in news, so I let The Bobby Pin go. The “sponsored” products, the ad money, the web traffic I’d worked hard to earn disappeared. Anyone who thinks blogging is easy is totally wrong. I often think about how late I would stay up to keep content going. Now I am grumpy if I’m doing anything past 11.

I started this blog because I tend to lean on the “dark and stormy” side. I thought it would be good for me to have a place where I look for the bright and sunny. I knew the move to Utah would be tough for multiple reasons (and it has, oh it has) and I wanted to focus on the good (there’s been plenty of that too). And I hoped that in doing so I would stay out of a sad place.

In an effort to be vulnerable, there’s been plenty of sad this year. And while I love my job, I hear a lot of sad stories. I was right that looking for the good was a good idea. I just didn’t do it.

So the question is, do I give Make Today Great another go? More effort? More outfits? More women’s issues? More tech? More…

Do I succumb to pressure to start a blog on social media and make that officially all I ever talk about? Ugh, so one dimensional, but also, I have a lot to say.

I thought I’d post it on the interwebs and see if I received any feedback. After all, no one blogs to interact with themselves. They still make journals for that.

Pictures are from my grandma’s 90th birthday party and my great-grandma’s 97th. I’ve had quite the summer even if I haven’t told the Internet.

Tonight I went to Lowe’s and proclaimed “someday I want to be able to say I’ve purchased something from every aisle.”

We always laugh at Lowe’s. Especially about the fact that when were apartment-dwellers, we used to wonder how a place so big stayed in business. Now I frequent that store more than I do Costco and Target combined. And I find myself thinking “sure, I could install window blinds myself, no problem.”

Seriously, I am so excited when we can cross off one of our “easy to do, but slightly more expensive” projects, like buy all new doorknobs for our house so that they actually match. We have brass doorknobs, oil rubbed bronze light fixtures and brushed nickel faucets and hardware. This house makes no sense. The other day I said “the problem with a fixer-upper is that there is always a project” before I realized that was the whole point.

Usually the low-cost, high-labor ones make the top of the list before doorknobs. But, the past month, I’ve been thinking about where I was a year ago. I had made my plan — finish my job at MTS, then finish my MBA at a leisurely pace, with a lot of studying on the beach. I’d end with a study abroad in Brazil — like I had done in China the year before — and then husband would fly in and we’d climb Macchu Picchu.

Almost none of that happened. My current position came across my radar in July. I applied because I thought it sounded perfect and perfect-sounding jobs are so hard to come by. But then I wrote it off. And then I was going to Utah anyway, so I interviewed. And the people were amazing. And then I accepted. After I hung up the phone, I realized I had also just committed to moving back to Utah. I was at school at the time — at a conference. Before I even told the husband we were moving to Utah, I’d added two classes so I could finish in December — ending the leisurely MBA idea and the study abroad plans. The last months in San Diego were spent studying or working, and the highlights were those times I ditched it all to meet my friends for lunch or playgroup.

I learned that “playgroup” is really just an excuse to hit up Starbucks and chat — and don’t anyone tell me otherwise.

So now I’m fluent at Lowe’s and back in a newsroom and that part is pretty awesome. And, hey, the MBA is finished without a single nervous breakdown to show for it. I’m looking toward what’s next. Though I have to say, this house is taking up plenty of time. And I’m liking finally getting that leisure I fought so hard for.

I was thinking about this quest I set out in. To find the great. Every day. And I realized that there just aren’t that many great things going on. So much of life is “keep on, keeping on” and not a lot is changing. Which is fine, I’m enjoying the quiet.

Then tonight, a story that I helped out with at KSL was nominated for an Emmy. I just helped out — it was part of our KSL Interactive brand that uses social media to drive content. But it was a good reminder to me that even though life’s steps in adulthood are no longer measured by grade advancements and summer breaks, with each stop forward, you aren’t taking one back.

Also? I’m determined to take a break from the Internet this weekend. So much negativity. Even when it isn’t aimed directly at you, it wears you down. It’s important to leave that alone for a bit.